When to End a Friendship (and How to Do It Without Starting a War or a Podcast)
There comes a moment in every adult’s life when you realize some friendships are like milk — they don’t go bad all at once, they just start smelling faintly weird.
When:
- When every interaction feels like customer service.
- When you leave lunch feeling emotionally audited.
- When you’ve been “meaning to text back” since the Obama administration.
- When they clap for your failure faster than your success.
Why:
Because friendship isn’t a rescue mission, a subscription service, or a nostalgia museum.
Because people evolve, and sometimes you’re simply running different emotional operating systems.
Because maintaining the wrong friendships costs the energy you need for the right ones.
How:
You have two exits: the fade or the finale.
- The fade is the quiet art of simply not being available — fewer texts, slower replies, no sudden confrontations. Polite ghosting for those who don’t deserve drama.
- The finale is when you call it like a breakup: “This isn’t working anymore.” It’s brutal but oddly liberating. Pro tip: no need to explain more than once. Closure is a self-service concept.
And then, after it’s done, you’ll rediscover how peaceful silence can be — until your phone pings again and you realize you’ve just been added to a new group chat.
